What Women/Men Really Mean (Based off two Articles I Found Online)

For fun, I thought I’d throw in my two cents on the whole ‘What does she mean?’/”What does he mean?” mystery that plagues men and women everwhere.  Here’s the original article for the men: http://yahoo.match.com/y/article.aspx?articleid=12001&TrackingID=526103&BannerID=686129 and here’s the article for the women: http://yahoo.match.com/magazine/article.aspx?articleid=11997

So I’m going to take what “she” says and interpret it in a no nonsense and easy to understand language.  😉  Ready for some fun?  Here we go…

If you are a man, here is what the woman really means…

1. “You’re really sweet, but I have a boyfriend.”

Two options (a is if she’s telling the truth and b is if she’s lying):

a. I really do have a boyfriend.

b. You’re as sexy as a tree stump. 

2. “Why don’t I take your number and I’ll call you?”

It’s not happening, pal.  (Number will be conveniently lost.)

3.  “Oh, sorry, I already have weekend plans.”

Two options again because this could be the truth:

a.  I have plans with family or friends, and I don’t ditch them for anyone.

b. I’m busy this weekend, the next, and the one after that.  So you have no chance.  Beat it, dude.

4.   “So, what have you been up to?”

I can’t believe it, but I actually missed you.

5.  “If you want to have a guy’s night, go ahead, fine.”

Two options:

a.  If she’s got self-esteem, this is the truth.  She doesn’t need you to stick around for every little thing.  or  “Yes!  Time to myself so I can watch that movie he hates or take a bubble bath or (insert other favorite activity her guy doesn’t like).”

b.  Now, if she doesn’t have self-esteem, then here’s what she means: “I will remind you of this for the rest of your life, so get ready for major guilt trips, pal!”

6.  “So, tell me about Diane.”

She better be a relative or just a friend because if she’s not, I’m punching your lights out.

7.   “I love the way you smell.”

Thank you for bathing and wearing deoderant.

****

If you are a woman, this is what a man really means…

1. “We should hang out some time.”

I like you.

2.  “I really like your shoes.”

Two options:

a. You are so ugly that I can’t find anything else to compliment you on.

b.  I’m lame because I neglected to mention your eyes, your hair, your smile, your beauty…. 

3.  “Maybe we should take some time off from each other — you know, take a break.”

I’ll never commit to you.  All you’re good for is a booty call.  (Run, don’t walk, away from this guy, ladies.)

4.  “I am listening!”

Can I help it if I don’t speak “woman”?  You all confuse the heck out of me!

5.  “You’re just too good for me.”

It’s over.

6.  “I think I’m falling in love with you.”

You’re great, babe.  Let’s see where this thing is headed.

***

So you see, it’s not such a big mystery after all.  😀

About Ruth Ann Nordin

Ruth Ann Nordin mainly writes historical western romances and Regencies. From time to time, she branches out to contemporaries romances and other genres (such as science fiction thrillers). For more information, please go to www.ruthannnordin.com or check out https://ruthannnordinauthorblog.wordpress.com.
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6 Responses to What Women/Men Really Mean (Based off two Articles I Found Online)

  1. irishmary24 says:

    # 5 If a man tells you you are too good for him, Believe it with ALL YOUR HEART, and get out of there!!! He’s telling you even more than he would want you to know!!!!!

  2. hahaha! yes! right on the money for both – and # 6 under what women say is priceless and I SO know that one – heh-heh! Another man trap is

    “Don’t you think she’s cute?”

    means either
    a – she’s cute or
    b – you better NOT say yes or else… LOL!

  3. Christina Busby says:

    lol i HATE my pc. I commentyed on this saying it was hilarious and sooo true at the same time. 😉

    • Some of the things the original authors of those articles were off base, so I had to re-interpret. lol How they could miss some of the common sense stuff, I don’t know. I never told a guy I liked the way he smelled because I loved him; I just liked the way he smelled.

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