I’m thinking I need to change the way I do things on this blog. I’ve been posting up works in progress and word counts, and for a while, that worked. But I’m starting to think it’s not working anymore.
For example, I’ve already posted up works in progress over the past year that I ended up ditching later on. I can think of a couple off the top of my head, and right now I’m wondering, “Why don’t I feel like writing Clayton’s Win when it was finally getting back on track?” I don’t know the answer to that.
I think it boils down to stress. I think by putting up these books and saying I’m going to work on them, it somehow creates pressure to get them done and published. It used to motivate me, but now it seems to have trapped me. Maybe that’s the thing that happens to everyone at some point. You start out doing something, and it works great for some time. Then along the way, you realize it’s not working so well, but you press through it anyway because it used to work and you wonder, “What’s wrong with me? I used to do this all the time.”
The longer you push through it, the harder it gets, and then you find you’ve stalled. You realize there’s no way you can keep doing it. The system did work great, and it’s worked great for about a year. I loved it, but it’s looking like it’s time to move onto something different. I’m not sure what different will look like. I still like character interviews and the scenes that never made it into the book. But I don’t think I should post up works in progress until after I finish the first draft.
So I’m going to remove the widgets on the side that list my works in progress. Works that are being edited or have just been released, I can see putting up there because once the first draft is done, I know I can say the book will be published.
I’m also going to stop talking about my works in progress. I know I’ve disappointed some people by mentioning books I’m going to do or have started and then I stop writing them because I stall out or realize the idea isn’t going to work like I thought it would. I’m tired of disappointing people. I’d rather post up a “I finished the first draft of this book…” announcement than say, “I don’t think this story is going to work after all.” I feel like a jerk when I say, “I won’t be doing this book like I thought I would.” 😦
I don’t know if this new system will work, and maybe it won’t. But I need to try something else. If it doesn’t work, I can always go back to the old way or try something different.