I’m starting to think people are assuming, based on my posts, that I believe authors should never accept any type of criticism on their work.  I didn’t say that.  I didn’t mean that.

What I’m saying is that the source of the criticism is all important.  At least it is to me.  It’s really hard to misunderstand someone who emails me with a ‘Your writing is like the writing of a fourth grader.  You suck.’  There’s only one way to interpret something like that.  Or someone who emails you with a message like this is not being unclear either: ‘I read your book and found so many flaws in it, I don’t even know where to start.  I’m surprised you have the courage to publish this stuff.  If you really want to get serious about being a professinal author, then here’s a list of seven things you must do.  Otherwise, no one will ever read your books because word of mouth will kill you.’

Honestly, what author is going to be open to those types of criticisms?  And why are some of you insisting that I give some of those people the time of day by thanking them when they were so blatantly rude?  Sure, some things get misinterpreted in an email, like tone of voice.  But it’s hard to misinterpret the scenarios I mentioned above, isn’t it? 

I don’t know why so many authors are concerned with how I handle emails.  I’ve been getting emails based on what I said in these posts from authors who tell me if I was smart, I’d heed all kinds of feedback, both good and bad.

What they neglect to consider is the source of the feedback.  Sadly, more often than not, these are beginning writers who write to me this way.  I don’t know who these people are.  I never met them anywhere else online.  They email me out of the blue like this, and I don’t know if they really believe that method is helpful or if they are intentionally being mean, but I see no reason why I have to respond to them at all.

Now, here are the sources of criticism I do welcome and I’ll state why:

1. Authors who I know well enough to have established a friendship with.  The reason for this is because they have earned my trust, and since they are friends, I know they are giving criticisms to help me.  When they tell me something that stings, they say it nicely.  There’s a big difference between someone you know who has your best interest in mind versus a stranger who comes at you out of the blue with a list of criticisms.  Maybe you haven’t gotten those strangers emailing you yet, but I know of some other authors who have and they feel the same way I do.  So if you are an author who wants to give me criticism, please take the time to be my friend first.

2.  Honestly, my best source of feedback (good and bad) come directly from my readers who have taken the time to get to know me.  The key is knowing these people.  When you know this person first, then it’s easier to understand where they are coming from.  I’m comfortable exchanging ideas with them and ask them if this other way is better.  These are my beta readers and my proofreaders.  They let me know what works and what doesn’t, what they like and what they don’t, etc.

Those are the two groups I listen to, and those are the two groups who never send me those rude emails.  I know some of you don’t like hearing this, but I stand my ground.  I will no longer give those rude people the time of day.  As soon as I see what type of email it is, I’m trashing it.  I refuse to acknowledge these people anymore.  And if that makes me a horrible author, then fine, I’m horrible.  If that means my work will suffer because I can’t ‘take it’, then fine, my work will suffer.  I’m perfectly willing to take a total loss of sales in exchange for some peace and quiet in my life.  I don’t get paid enough to put up with some of the stuff I’ve been putting up with for this past year.  There comes a time when you have to say enough, and I say I’ve had enough.